Hymns of the Lukewarm Church
[author and source unknown]

The Lukewarm Church announces publication of "New Church Songs."
We chose this title because we didn't want to turn anybody off with
threatening words that no one understands anymore like
"worship" or "hymn."
People in today's society get uncomfortable
with too much talk about things like
commitment and dedication.
They'd much rather have a religion that they can turn on or off at will.
Our book seeks to meet that need.

Sample contents:

A Comfy Mattress Is Our God
Joyful, Joyful, We Kinda Like Thee
Amazing Grace, How Interesting the Sound
Be Thou My Hobby
O God, Our Enabler in Ages Past
Blest Be the Tie That Doesn't Cramp My Style
He's Quite a Bit to Me
Oh, How I Like Jesus
I Lay My Inappropriate Behaviors on Jesus
Pillow of Ages, Fluffed for Me
I'm Fairly Certain That My Redeemer Lives
Self-Esteem to the World! The Lord is Come
Special, Special, Special
Stick Nearby, It's Getting Dark Outside
There is Scattered Cloudiness in My Soul Today
What an Acquaintance We Have in Jesus
When the Saints Go Sneaking In
Where He Leads Me, I Will Consider Following

Home / For Latter-day Saints