Unlikely Marriages
[author and source unknown]

1. If Kitty Carlisle married Conway Twitty, she'd be Kitty Twitty.

2. If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.

3. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.

4. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.

5. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.

6.If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.

7. If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.

8. If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.

9. If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.

10. How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.

11. If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali G.

12. If Shirley Jones married Tom Ewell, then Johnny Rotten, then Nathan Hale, she'd be Shirley Ewell Rotten Hale.

13. If Ivana Trump married, in succession, Orson Bean (actor), King Oscar (of Norway), Louis B. Mayer (of MGM), and Norbert Wiener (mathematician), she would then be Ivana Bean Oscar Mayer Wiener.

14. If Woody Allen married Natalie Wood, divorced her and married Gregory Peck, divorced him and married Ben Hur, he'd be Woody Wood Peck Hur.


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